Lazy Monday

I thought I should start out the New Year fresh and bloggy but then I had another think. Instead, I gave myself a mental vacation, mourning the return of my kids to school with minute attention to several application games on facebook. Thankfully, my sister provided this hilarious blogbite for our entertainment. She is my very first guest blogger. BTW, she is genetically linked to that guy featured to the left (to the left)...who, with skill and wit, has used his camera morphing program and natural good looks to provide us with some lovely art.

Splitsville

by Jessica Hall

riddle me this: why? oh why? every time i am pregnant must i end up in a split that is at once too deep to get out of and EVER DEEPENING, RIPPING MY GROIN to SHREDS!!!!!!!

so there i was, straddling my bath, reaching to clean up the far side of the bath WHEN SUDDENLY my foot slips out from under me, and keeps slipping farther and farther away from my center. laughing and crying, and crying even harder at the laugh/cry combo, and peeing my pants and 100% STUCK.

i have no idea how i got out of the split-but the only thing that saved me from NEVER getting up again was the side of the bath digging into my crotch, providing me with just enough support to get up again.

it was insane, i still haven't recovered and am self medicating by double fisting ice cream sandwiches!

Artwork by Tom Dowd

Model:Tom Dowd